Was it after I taught myself to end each sentence in a question mark
And convinced myself to forget what I wish I had known was real?
When doubt sank through my mind, a heavy stone
With rough edges that screamed and ripped at my insides until all I became
Was a pile of crudely torn flesh and fantasy
I watch my fingers sift through the mess
Struggling to string it back together
Which piece goes where?
Something grabs at my hands, forcing them away
And I realize
Maybe I stopped caring when I learned it wouldn’t help.


I left the mess alone.

The breeze hit my arm so hard I could faint
Though the warmth left, you chose to stay around
The cold has innocence, as such a saint
Rain goes by but I cannot hear a sound

As hopeful as a bee can be for me
The sun shines the lawn, as the flowers grow
For you to see the me in you and in me
The clouds will start the day and let me know

The animals come out and play along
The cardinals will use their voice to sing
The bruise is scary, what do I say?
The house telephone creeps and starts to ring

Leave me in sorrow and pain, in the heat
You were my love so I will take defeat.

To be weak is to be strong
Our toughest battles are fought alone
Power is to have forgone
One pursuit of strength, is angels syndrome

Our wounds heal while shown
Hidden not from our fear
Accepting of the unknown
Trauma’s fight is nothing new

Hurt attacks with disgust and regret
Striking of our weakest parts
Acceptance defends with passion and content
We do feel hurt.

Shown scars look the most
Deep gashes strike deepest.

In Shadows deep, the cruel cycle of death turns,
Bound by the shackles of death, perseveres,
A haunting echo of relentless night,
Menacing circles in a web untamed,
As titans loom, colossal and so stark,
Their presence veils the truth, a world estranged.

Within the confinement of the walls, humanity estranged,
Their fear ignites as fate relentlessly turns,
The Titans’ wrath, a force unsettling, stark,
A cycle born from fear, strife perseveres,
In every heart, a struggle left untamed,
Their hope, a flicker in the darkest night

Eldians verse Marleyans, locked in endless night,
History’s burdens keep them so estranged,
Their shared suffering, emotions left untamed,
The past’s weight on fate’s persistent turn,
These paths, how far and wide they persevere,
A stalemate conflict standing strong and stark.

Hero’s resolve, a mission grim and stark,
A desire to be free of endless night,
To shatter chains; where sorrow thus perseveres
To bridge the gap of races so estranged,
Against Freedom’s sake, how it fiercely turns.

There is nothing but a shout 
Grasping and gaping for the shrill 
Though it tends to be the one foot out 

The House shivers and doubts 
Motor is running yet still, 
There is nothing but a shout 

Why is it that we make a route 
To resume the sunken search of will 
Though it tends to be one the foot out 

And the impudent, overbearing crowd 
For them a hollow play until,  
There is nothing but a shout 

So then, the wild look to scout 
Aiming and aiming to fulfill 
Though it tends to be the one foot out 

Though there is silence throughout 
In the House, a loud souvenir  
There is nothing but a shout 
Though it tends to be the one foot out 

Apples on a pure porcelain plate
Taste sweeter and crisper
Coming from your knife
Without fail.

Sister got stitches from
Pushing the blade far too hard
Into the apple core.
Slice, slice 
So it slivers the apple and her hand.
All she wanted
Was that taste, while
She watches the apple-skin-colored blood
Drip, drip down.
Sister never liked
Green apples anyway.

I saw slices on my desk
Without fail,
Every night.
I see your smile
Without fail,
Almost every night.
I saw neither,
After our screams.
They stick in the air
And stare into my red core.
Yet, the silence afterward
is what stings
The most.

But the apples returned
On their pure porcelain plate
On my desk,
After the morning arose
Accompanied by an
Apology. 

In tempest crimson, bleed your spirits high
Upon the wall, a canvas, to be red
A dye of perfect hue drained from my thigh
A gift of slumber, freedom from your head

A scream, unrestrained, let the echoes fly
In laughter's dance, a playful, fraught supply
Release the shackles, don't in silence lie
The sound, a masterpiece into my eye

My heart deranged, my soul fell in the night
In life's grand fabric, soon to woven ties
The laughter fades, as dusk in sunset light
Yet echoes linger, where the bleeding lies

So bleed, scream, laugh, the human cries
This dark art, I take with me to the skies

our sun gives gifts that shine bright and persist
but now takes leave and will succumb to shade
its last glimmer surrounds me in a mist
that, too, will quickly dry; away it fades

horizon steals the star in ruthless ways,
indignant, for he cannot know of life
now robbed of light, we're obscured in a maze
of walls, which hold our heartbreak, loss, and strife

the light is fading from my yearning eyes
the world around me dies and grows so cold
this brittle smile, and adequate disguise
for jagged, futile heart that once was gold.

as Sisyphus was bound atop his hill
my lamp grows feeble; man has lost his will

Laughter and voices drown out the carols
A warm glow lights a place hidden from the snow
A match flicks and lights a wick's fire
The room fills with the aroma of needles
It lurks and finds those in apple-colored sweaters
Delightful pine soon enters their nose
Children have snot dripping from their nose
They run in, changing the words to classic carols
While specks stick to their sweaters
They debate going back to the snow
But their feet tingle with pins and needles
They opt to let their toes warm by the fire
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
Jack Frost nipping at your nose
Elves sing along as they weave their needles
To the wise words of Nat King Cole's Christmas carols
They prepare at the sign of the first snow
For endless months of making sweaters
Families sit with knees tucked under sweaters
Sipping hot cocoa fresh off the fire
They look out the window at their man made of snow
Laughing as a deer bites at its carrot nose
Someone finds a vinyl with an album full of carols
They pull out the record player and position the needle

Walkin' around, frost from your breath as we go
Watching all the delicate snowflakes fall
Look at the trees, see the glistening snow

Ice on the streams, the water no longer flows
Forever I can still hear your quiet call
Walkin' around, frost from your breath as we go

Through the dead branches, the sun can still glow
Countless snow angels on the ground, a sprawl
Look at the trees, see the glistening snow

Smilin' so peacefully at the serene tableau
Feelin' so small every time we see it all
Walkin' around, frost from your breath as we go

Stay out in the cold, despite all we know
Out getting caught in quite the snowy squall
Look at the trees, see the glistening snow

Icicles dangling from trees all in rows
Wrapped up together in a warming shawl
Walkin' around, frost from your breath as we go
Look at the trees, see the glistening snow